Bumper sticker:

"IF YOU CAN READ THIS, YOU'RE TOO CLOSE."

I find that hilarious for some reason. Particularly as it applies to this blog.

Ok I'll stop qualifying myself in future. Who cares. You cannot touch me.

Nyeh-nyehhhnyeh-nyehh-nyehhhh.


"Something from Eileen’s blog.

“Take a look at an apple tree. There might be five hundred apples on the tree, but each apple has just ten seeds. That’s a lot of seeds! We might ask, “Why would you need so many seeds to grow just a few more apple trees?” Nature has something to teach us here.

It’s telling us: “Not all seeds grow. In life, most seeds never grow. So if you really want to make something happen, you had better try more than once.”

This might mean:
- You’ll attend twenty interviews to get one job.
- You’ll interview forty people to find one good employee.
- You’ll talk to fifty people to sell one house, one car, one vacuum cleaner, one insurance policy, or a business idea.
- And you might meet a hundred acquaintances just to find one special friend.”

Perhaps that’s why I’m so proud of my friends for no sane reasons. I feel really proud when I tell people about us - the things we did and the places we went, the lame jokes and all the memories.

I’m proud to have them as friends."

I sent out... I think more than 70 job applications in 2007.

I only took on 4 jobs for which I was paid more than a month (meaning I stayed on more than a month). And that means I was interviewed for less than 10 jobs.


People who had thought nothing of me then, have nothing to commend them to me now, I suppose? Their fucking loss. When you've been patronised and scrubbed into dirt, can you not feel anything less than angry? Well, do you? I should show you some of my rejection letters.

My response rate then was absymal but those who could see me, saw me, and they were all good. It takes talented people to spot talent. And finally one of them did, and it was my current boss (well so were the previous 2). Do you kow how angry it makes a person feel, to be judged?


So ... when it comes to friends... Yea its all good. At first. Don't be the first to judge them.


Your friends get older. They change. They find new priorities to align their needs and sense of self with. They find grudges, but only because they were grudged against. Yea some people turn nasty but I always believe it is because nasty things were done to them. I try (i often fail) not to judge them.

But forgive them everything, and you will hang on to them.

But you will also change too. And when you do, who can you count on???


What they do about how they feel about you, however, is their own fucking business.

They can fuck themselves, but don't let them do that to you.

Draw this line early.


Edit (this means I am editing this post. ok?): would you not want to have 1500 more apple trees like yourself? I personally don't but lets not compare apples to Vince. I want 15 million people like me. Give me more seeds. HAhaha.

Let's have a little passion for life! I'm not an apple. Damn it. I do love green ones though. They be crisp and anti-thirst.

Oh and... to those people who fall in love with married folks ...

Never forget the degree of sentimentality/need/insecurity that allowed them to marry their husband/wife in the first place.

With kids, add 10 times the amount of sentimentality.

Break this rule, you'll break your heart.

This is a warning to me.

There are a lot of ideas in this post, and I'm actually frankly really drunk when I made each amendment. (you can tell from each difference in tone.)

But such is the trust in you, my dear reader, that you find the right way. No matter how I say it.

I am not for an easy-reading lazy or stupid audience.

I do not have the fucking time or the patience.

Unless I'm paid to do it.