It occurs to me that in everything I've ever written, I forecasted my own future and lived it out.

I'd want to live out Swipe. It'd be awesome to be rich and callous.

Yes, I am that shallow.

But so are you.

Today's mileage was topping 60. Met a 45 year old italian dude who rode a Marin Eldridge Trail with a Manitou fork. That was an awesome bike back in the day. I used to have a Marin Muirwoods with about the same specs.

Due to language barriers, he thought I was on the trail for the first time and guided me along to Mandai Zoo.

It is nice to ride with someone, for a change. I asked if he was going to get a new bike and he said, probably not. It makes me rethink the Epiphany. My bike turns 10 in July but his Marin must be older and he still rides faster than me.

I mean, there are a lot of things you can do with 5k (estimated total damage from a new Epiphany with parts).


How would a new bike compensate me for 5k? I already can clean most of the slopes in Bt Timah trail. Except when it's wet.

Sure, my back really hurts, but only on the right back, and I tend to write it off to my fats getting in the way of a good race-crouch.

It's posts like this that makes me feel older than I actually am.

Song I love right now, but remixed by the Ministry of Sound:

Artist: Evermore
Song: It's Too Late
Album: It's Too Late

Lyrics :

Monday morning, hesitate
I can’t get out of bed
I’d rather go back to the dreams
I’m living in my head
Yeah… yeah yeah yeah

Tuesday evening, pack my bags
I’m heading out the door
I left a box of memories
lying on the floor
Yeah… yeah yeah yeah

Ride on… ride ‘til early morning turn
Ride on… like the dawning of the day
It’s too late
to let all your feelings show
Go on ‘til the night is swept away

Running from the city lights
Running from this empty life
I’m running out of time tonight
Screaming out for help! Help!

Slow down you’re moving too fast
Go home you’ll feel better for it
Oh boy you better stop dreaming it’s all in your head

‘Cause it’s too late now

Ride on… ride ‘til early morning turn
Ride on… like the dawning of the day
It’s too late
to let all your feelings show
Go on ‘til the night is swept away

Ride on… run ‘til early morning sun
Ride on… like the morning of the day
It’s too late
To let every feeling show
Ride on… ‘til the night is swept away

Last night I quit drinking.

That was not a good idea.

I ended up with nightmares all night. I dreamt that my dad died and I had to keep his virgil. And I spent the whole night trying to avoid the idea that he was dead, by proxy (I was avoiding looking at his body all night long. That's what, 6 hours???)

And then, he moved, as if he was only asleep, and spoke to me. I forget about what.

And then after we had him cremated and all, I laid on the same couch where I placed him for the virgil afterwards, because I was so exhausted.

The fucking shittiest part of that dream was after I woke up and realised it was a dream, I still had that sense of loss in me when I awoke. I was out at 9am to ride offroad in the hills and he was out for breakfast but I still felt that pang.

So that's why I am drinking beer at 4pm in the afternoon.

Because the last time I dreamt about my mum... shit happened.